Tuesday, September 6, 2011

FIRST CAMPAIGNERS CHALLENGE




Rach writes -http://rachaelharrie.blogspot.com/2011/09/first-campaigner-challenge.html  ,in 200 words or less to write a short story/ flash fiction excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words ‘The door swung open’, which will be included in the word count. If you want to give yourself an added challenge use the same beginning words and end with the words ‘the door swung shut’ also included in the word count.

Entries for first campaigner will close on 9th September ‘11. So, link up and write your story. And yes, there are amazing prizes to be won.

The (last) touch.

The door swung open. She was sitting there, by the window on her rocking chair staring into nothingness. Not even a flicker as I near her. Only a slight pause in the rocking which resumes to my annoyance. No smile, no memories, no thoughts and no hope. Only a dying brain. It was as if she was suspended in time. Her immobile mind had no past or future.
Alzheimer’s had killed it all – her mind, her spirit, her life; and with her ours too. We felt orphaned even when she lived, a wasted life. She was once the best mom one can wish for.

Mom had held the family together. Now, without her towering presence of life which was dwarfed and dimmed by the disease, we were disintegrating. Maybe, we could not handle the stress. Initially, she had been brave, replacing it with anger, then dejection and finally nothing. Wish I could fell nothing. She vegetated in a vegetative state. It was painful for us, the family.

Today, I talk to her. Rambling on. Yet, nothing. I say goodbye tI realize that it is for the last time. As I walk out, the door swung shut.
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24 comments:

  1. Carrie ButlerSeptember 6, 2011 at 10:18 AM

    The is so sad and deeply powerful! Great work, Janu. :)

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  2. AnonymousSeptember 6, 2011 at 11:29 AM

    A terrible disease, painful to all surrounding the one afflicted with it. Heart wrenching. But the conciseness of it makes it powerful. Very touching!

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  3. JANUSeptember 6, 2011 at 12:41 PM

    Thanks Carrie and Sonia for stopping by and appreciating me.

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  4. The East CoasterSeptember 6, 2011 at 2:56 PM

    I've lost two family members to this and it's nearly impossible to describe the true horror of it. This was tough for me to read, but I'm so glad I did. Well done. You did a great job of capturing something so raw.

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  5. JANUSeptember 6, 2011 at 4:27 PM

    Sorry for you loss, The East Coaster. And thanks for the appreciation.

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  6. Nadja NotarianiSeptember 7, 2011 at 4:35 AM

    Very 'real-life' vibe to your entry. As a few other comments say, powerful. ~ Nadja

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  7. Alleged AuthorSeptember 7, 2011 at 5:04 AM

    This was quite sad but very realistic. Great job!

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  8. TrishaSeptember 7, 2011 at 5:40 AM

    Very tragic story :( I'm sure a lot of people out there can relate to this.

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  9. deepsSeptember 7, 2011 at 7:29 AM

    Ahaaa that’s a new form of challenge and you seemed to have crossed the hurdles quite smoothly :P

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  10. AnonymousSeptember 7, 2011 at 8:29 AM

    Such an awful disease. Well done. Mine is #72

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  11. JANUSeptember 7, 2011 at 8:44 AM

    Nadja - My mom passed on some years back and it was because of the disease ALS. The pain felt here is real. Thanks for dropping by. xx

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  12. JANUSeptember 7, 2011 at 8:45 AM

    Alleged Author and Trisha.....Thank you.

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  13. JANUSeptember 7, 2011 at 8:46 AM

    Bridgestraub.com- Thanks for dropping by and appreciating...will surely read and vote for you.

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  14. nikhimenonSeptember 7, 2011 at 2:21 PM

    sad

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  15. nikhimenonSeptember 7, 2011 at 2:22 PM

    the gud thing abt alzheimers s that the pt never knows that he/she has the disease..its the by-standers that have to bear the pain of this cruel disease...

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  16. M.K. NissenSeptember 7, 2011 at 8:03 PM

    Very touching and sad. This is a nice piece. Thanks for dropping by and commenting on my entry. Best of luck!

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  17. sibiSeptember 7, 2011 at 11:42 PM

    Well written!

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  18. JANUSeptember 8, 2011 at 8:18 AM

    Nikhimenon and Mary Mary - Thanks....:)

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  19. JANUSeptember 8, 2011 at 8:19 AM

    Thanks Sibi.

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  20. ShreyaSeptember 8, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    nice.. so touching.. :( keep posting!! :)

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  21. 1000th.monkeySeptember 9, 2011 at 6:16 AM

    oh, this was so sad... you really drew me in.

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  22. Avery MarshSeptember 9, 2011 at 9:30 AM

    I really felt the disconnect between the MC and the woman who was once his/her mother. You handled such a sad disease in a poignant way.

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  23. JANUSeptember 9, 2011 at 9:51 AM

    @Shreya - Thank you.
    1000th.monkey - thanks
    AveryMarsh - Thank you too.

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  24. Doreen McGettiganSeptember 19, 2011 at 4:01 AM

    Wow! Great description. I work with alzheimers patients and it is heartbreaking.

    I wrote a blog post called "The Forgotten Women" for http://www.womenontheverge.net check it out if you have a chance. It is a great support site as well!!

    http://www.doreenmcgettigan.com

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