HALFWAY THERE.

A month since my surgery, the fracture has healed. And, now I can start weight bearing on my right leg, that too bit by bit. First, I have to walk on my toes, then a bit more pressure on the foot, then full pressure on the whole foot. Sounds easy, right? This will take another 2 months to happen. Two more months! I can’t wait!

After coming back from the hospital yesterday after my final check up...I tentatively put my right foot down and pressed my toes on the ground. My leg recoiled...the sensation was akin to a thousand pins pricking my skin. The sensation was something like an electric shock travelling the length of my leg, temporarily disorienting me. Took a deep breath and tried again...same feeling but, definitely manageable...so much better than hopping.

My daughter, who was watching me, imitated me asking if I had to walk that particular way (walking on one foot flat and with other foot on the toes) and she did this without a walker. Even, when the doctor showed me how I should be walking...he did it without a walker. And so, I should be able to do it without the walker, right? So wrong! I took my hands off the walker and tried taking a step...nothing. I couldn’t lift my right leg. And when I did lift it, I was so out of balance that I almost fell. Shit! My brain had adapted and conditioned itself to meet the new requirements of my body...and now, it again has to unlearn and relearn to adapt the new way of walking. Talk about conditioning.

I practiced it and got it right. Though I am now able to walk a few steps without walker, I am still dependent on it. My legs muscles are still weak...they start to shake uncontrollably and my knees threaten to buckle. I am just halfway through. I always preached my mom – “Don’t let your body rule you, let your mind rule your body” and now is time I practiced this.